Golden Globes host Seth Meyers kicked off the 75th annual awards ceremony with a 14-minute monologue full of jokes about the perpetrators of recent sexual assault and harassment charges, as well as a few relatively minor pokes at our current President.
“Good evening, ladies, and remaining gentlemen…” the monologue began. “It’s 2018. Marijuana is allowed and sexual harassment finally isn’t.” (Obviously, that got a huge round of applause.)
“This was the year of Big Little Lies and Get Out and also the tv series Big Little Lies and movie Get Out,” Meyers continued.
“It’s been years since a white man has been this nervous in Hollywood. This is the first time in three months where it won’t be terrifying to hear your name called out.”
“Considering what’s been going on this year with powerful men and their terrible behavior in Hollywood, a lot of people thought it might be more appropriate to have a woman host these awards,” he said. “They may be right, but if it’s any consolation, I’m a man with absolutely no power in Hollywood. I’m not even the most powerful Seth in the room tonight,” as the camera cut to Seth Rogen.
“Remember when HE was the guy making trouble with North Korea? Remember that? Simpler times.” (This was a reference of course to Rogen’s comedy The Interview.)
That led into another joke about President Trump. “We’re all here tonight courtesy of the Hollywood Foreign Press, a string of three words that couldn’t be better designed to infuriate our president: Hollywood foreign press. The only name that would make him angrier is the Hilary Mexico Salad Association.”
Harvey Weinstein wasn’t going to be ignored in Meyer’s monologue either, as the host stated: “I think it’s time to address the elephant not in the room. Harvey Weinstein isn’t here tonight., because I’ve heard rumors that he’s crazy and difficult to work with. But don’t worry, he’ll be back in 20 years when he becomes the only person to be booed during the ‘In Memorium'” That joke got booed, and Meyers said, “It will sound like that.”
He then switched to jokes about Get Out and nominee Daniel Kaluuya, who didn’t seem to appreciate the attention.
He then moved onto multiple Golden Globes nominee The Shape of Water with a poke at a former Cecil B. DeMille winner. “It’s just an incredibly beautiful film,” he began, “But I have to admit when I first heard about a film where a naive young woman falls in love with a disgusting sea monster, I thought, ‘Oh, man, not another Woody Allen movie.’ It’s like Manhattan in water.”
“One of my favorite shows of the year is The Deuce,” he said about the popular HBO series in one of his lighter jabs. “If you haven’t seen it, The Deuce is about Times Square during the ’70s when New York was so seedy there were two James Francos.”
He also did a bit of back-and-forth joking with Jessica Chastain, Billy Eichner, Issa Rae, Amy Poehler and even Downsizing‘s Hong Chau giving the punch lines of some Meyers’ more inappropriate jokes including a second shot at Kevin Spacey after suggesting Christopher Plummer replace him on House of Cards. Poehler, a former Golden Globes host herself, got rather sassy with Meyers.
And after that, they were off to the races with the first awards being announced, which you can follow along here.
Edward Douglas | East Coast Editor