Jane the Virgin returned last night, and I am sad to say, the episode fell flat. Jane and Rafael left us in the mid-season finale kissing, giving us hope that they would get back together (something that I have been rooting for since Michael died). But in this episode, Jane tells her mother that the kiss she and Rafael shared was nothing short of terrible – no spark, no gszzzush, no nothing. But for Rafael the kiss was magical. Ha! So we finally have the two protagonists come back together, and one of them is like “nah.” What are the odds?
I am taking this personally. I feel like Jane the Virgin is playing with my heart. I cheered when they killed off Michael (sorry, not sorry – he was a bore). I cheered when that “first love” animator broke up with her a few episodes ago. And I cheered when Petra broke things off with Rafael because I knew then, and only then, that Jane and Rafael would come to their senses and be together. But Jane has lost all of her marbles because that one kiss, in her mind, was awful.
See, here’s my issue with Jane sometimes. She’s wise but only to the extent of someone who just became wise. You know those kinds of people, people who have just discovered how to get a grip on life, so they look at every little thing as an indicator of what’s to come. It’s surprising that Jane would even be this way considering she has a romantic history with her baby’s daddy. Or…and this is where it gets interesting. Maybe her kissing experience with Rafael didn’t live up to her most recent kissing experience. I forget that Jane is new to the world of sex and all things related, so her appetite is different now. Maybe when she kissed Rafael before she lost her virginity, it felt like sparks and roses and stars because she had so much sexual energy stored up that it erupted in their G-rated play. Now that she has crossed over to the dark side, she may just not be that impressed. When I think about it this way, I don’t blame her.
Feeling that something might be up, Rafael, in cute fashion, creates counter-arguments to all the reasons he believes Jane would come up with to sabotage a relationship between the two of them. And in bad timing, right then, Jane tells him the real deal about that kiss. As expected, Rafael deflates. But he emerges from it immediately, accepting it as a challenge to please her in other ways. He whispers in her ear and tells her some things that the CW couldn’t get clearance to say on-air, but you and I both know what a series of cute giggles from Jane mean. Right before she’s about to see what Rafael can do (keep in mind, they’ve never had sex), their son Mateo walks in the room and says, “Good. You’re kissing. Are you going to get married now?” Apparently, Mateo has become the moral authority on that show.
I assume that Jane and Rafael will tell him that two people don’t have to be married in order to kiss. I assume this because Jane the Virgin, in another disappointing turn, has become so politically correct that it’s nauseating. I feel like someone is in the writer’s room checking off all the socially conscious things to include in each episode. And I know, I just know, Jane and Rafael are going to go down that route next week.
Keeping with the whole politically correct point, it is also in this episode that Darci Factor, Rogelio’s baby’s mother, is pumping milk for their baby girl. As she talks to Rogelio and his wife, Xo, the pump machine is still attached to her nipples. I got annoyed. I’d like to fully disclose that I was just at a Brooklyn brunch spot where a mother was breast-feeding her baby with no cover on. And what do you think my reaction was? I didn’t care at all because that is what happens in real life! But Jane the Virgin? That’s a show, and in my opinion, they’re trying way too hard to address every social issue. Stop it.
Here’s another example of Jane doing too much – In a flashback, Xo talks to Jane about having her first kiss. She says that when it happens, “his” or “her” tongue will yada yada yada. Why Jane? Why? Yes, it’s 2018, but at the “time” Xo was telling Jane this, it had to have been in the early ’90s, and I’m sorry no parent was that socially conscious, so yeah, that show is doing way too much.
While the show was entertaining, I kept getting annoyed with all of the “messages” in it. There was so much going on that I wasn’t sure what the focus was. Even the narrator had a hard time naming this episode. What wasn’t it about? I expect so much more, and I hope I’m not let down next week.
Season 4, Episode 8 (S04E08)
Jane the Virgin airs Monday at 9PM on CW
Jennifer spends her nights writing, her days securing insurance for TV shows, and her in-betweens blogging about the silliness and seriousness of life on her blog.
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Jennifer Ford | Contributor