“You lead, I shoot, Johnny gives a shit,” D’avin says to Dutch in the first five minutes of “Schooled.” It’s an offhanded comment, but it rings true for the series overall, while putting a fun dose of self-awareness into KILLJOYS. This, combined with the resurgence of a few familiar faces, some cute kids, and an overdose of sexual tension, makes “Schooled” the most enjoyable episode of Killjoys this season.
The team’s mission this week is to track down some genius kids and take them to the aptly named “Prodigy,” a school for gifted children. Prodigy seems like it would be for the X-Men of Westerly, but it definitely has some more shady stuff going on than Professor X would allow. The team is following up on a bunch of data that master villain Khlyen supposedly dropped right in the school, confirming all of the shady stuff. Dutch and D’avin pick up Jake, a sweet kid with an overprotective dad and a brother who has been at this school for three years. Before picking up this child, however, the two engage is some fun wrestling just to remind the audience that there is definitely some chemistry between them.
Speaking of chemistry, Johnny and Pawter have finally reunited and are having a great time sending coy smiles to each other. In the easiest way to get out of anything, Pawter arm wrestles her way out of capture much to Johnny’s amusement. She then joins the on the ship, as recurring characters are want to do in season two. Since she is a doctor, hopefully she will stick around longer than just an episode to lend a helping hand.
Once Pawter and the kids get on board, the goal is to deposit them at the school, and find a way to get Khlyen’s data. Sounds simple enough, but we know that’s never how these missions work. Once the crew and children arrive to Prodigy they quickly realize that everything is abandoned. The only movement is a cheesy welcome video from Delle Seyah, one of the morally ambiguous nine who is in charge of the company, and occasionally teams up with Dutch and hits on her. Soon after the video she shows up in the flesh, asking them what they are doing in her school.
The school, it turns out, has a non traditional learning style where they feed kids information through pods that connect to their brain. Watch out Harvard, we got the next learning craze for you right here. The pods apparently malfunctioned though, and Pawter and Johnny use their science to realize that the slight error ended up liquifying the kids. It’s pretty nasty. Delle Seyah let’s them know that the only person who could be responsible for this is Chambers, the matron of sorts to these kids. She is spotted a couple times, so naturally, everyone goes through the motions of setting a trap for her. Just as the trap is about to work, however, Pawter finds some of her DNA in the liquified goop, and boom! Chambers is a hologram.
D’avin, who has been guarding Jake and the other kids, is in for a nasty surprise when he gets knocked out by a robot, and Jake gets taken away from him. It turns out that Jake’s mysterious brother Olin was in fact the one responsible for all the destruction, but not just because he’s a vindictive teenager. Khylen’s data drop went right into his brain and really messed him up. Which would honestly happen to anyone with that much evil data in their brain. He cuts the oxygen line to the school, leaving everyone gasping for air. Anyone who knows scifi tropes knows that oxygen running out means revealing secrets. Delle Seyah tells Dutch that this learning system is the company’s way of keeping their knowledge through the youth, and D’avin tells Pawter that it’s chill if he dates her brother. You know, equally important things.
Johnny meanwhile, catches up to Olin and tries to appeal to his brotherly side. Dutch tries to figure out how to get the oxygen back on while having a fun amount of sexual tension with Delle Seyah. Dutch is equal opportunity with that stuff. It turns out it requires DNA to turn it back on, so the only logical choice is for Delle Seyah to kiss Dutch and have Dutch breathe on the sensors. Oddly enough that works, and everyone can breathe again. It timed perfectly with Johnny using his “giving a shit” to make Olin back down. Everybody wins!
Dutch still wants to get all the data out of Olin’s head, so she takes him to Alvis at the monastery to both get the data out, and hopefully make him a little more chill. This episode is hopped up on pheromones or something, because Dutch definitely gives a little wink and a nod to Alvis, making him the third person she has had an insane amount of chemistry with in the episode. It’s a fun time, though, and a satisfying conclusion to the most fun hour of Killjoys this whole season. The team worked together to save people, there was some kissing, and they ended up saving the day. Of course, there had to be a little tag at the end with Khlyen heading out to find Dutch, leaving bodies in his wake, but even that can’t tarnish the all around good time of “Schooled.
Raina Deerwater | Contributor