SCREAM QUEENS has been deviating from its early season 2 format of killing off a patient each week. Now that we know at least one of the Green Meanie killers, it seems that patients are free to leave the hospital healthy and well. As the episode opens, we are presented with the patient of the week: Wes, the dad/professor/Munsch’s lover from the first season. He’s complaining of a pain in his abdomen that he’s had since Munsch broke up with him. Because it’s a TV show, they operate with an epidural so that Wes can narrate what’s happened with him since we last saw him in the first season. The story is way too lengthy and involved to really care about but long story short—he didn’t have a tumor causing pain, he had a hairball. Because apparently, he has developed Trichophagia, a condition that means he pulls out his own hair and eats it. It’s also known as Rapunzel syndrome, which goes to the title of the episode. Wes also reveals that he wants to get back with Dean Munsch as he enjoyed their twisted romance, despite the fact that she got in the way of his relationship with his daughter, Gracie, the heroine of the first season. Brock is oddly jealous of the return of Munsch’s former lover, even as he continues to try to get into Chanel’s pants.
Speaking of Brock, it seems that he’s finally realized that the age gap between him and Chanel might be a bit much. Although she’s prone to moments of brilliance, Chanel is generally vapid and uninterested but at these glimpses, she’s more of a symbol of all young people rather than a single character. It’s highly annoying to be grouped in with this populace because although I’ve never watched MASH, I’ve certainly heard of it. And I can’t imagine not having a vague idea of when World War II took place and thinking that John Stamos is anywhere close to 80. It’s such a crazy scenario, even for Chanel, even for Scream Queens, that it could probably have been left out entirely. What’s most surprising about the whole thing is that Brock is actually bothered by the age gap, Chanel’s behavior, etc and talks about having feelings that real people would have—like being offended at being mistaken for 80. Less surprising is that he wants to stick with Chanel while having an elaborate secret affair with Dean Munsch. And of course, as a horny old lady Munsch is more than happy to get with Brock and Wes because it means twice the pounding for her, as it is charmingly put in the brilliant dialogue. Also, she looks awesome in her 80s style workout leotard, even not breaking a sweat.
The actually important storyline is that Zayday is back and has Chamberlain working as her sidekick. Also, Chamberlain is obsessed with Zayday and keeps texting her and replying to her numerous social media posts. Bizarre romance aside, the duo comes up with a crazy, unrealistic and overly elaborate plan to figure out the identity of the Green Meanie by tracing the fabric of the very specific costume. Zayday eventually tracks her costume to the creepiest fabric store in the universe where the tailor reveals that he’s made three Green Meanie costumes over the years, which he remembers according to handjobs. It’s another unnecessary sexual reference but so par for the course that I don’t even react anymore. Through a series of careful plot twists, Zayday ends up kidnapped by the bad guy again—something that she notes on the very self-aware show. And she can’t reach Chamberlain, who is following a lead of his own because he discovered some odd things in the middle of the hairball that he was sticking in the swamp as part of the hospital’s medical waste program.
Meanwhile, it turns out that Gracie is not working on her Master’s at Stanford, but instead in a looney bin called Stanford something or other. Wes confesses this to Chamberlain when Chamberlain confronts him about the weird things that lurked in his hairball. Asking Wes why he ate all the hair is a great line because it somehow reflects the numerous things that don’t make sense on the show—from the relationships between characters that hate each other to the random twist that is linking the first season to the current season. Wes was a suspect for the Red Devil the first time around and now it looks like he is definitely a Green Meanie because he stabs Chamberlain (I hope he recovers by next week because he’s the only character I’ve gotten attached to) and blames the Chanels for his daughter’s current mental state.
By the time the chaos concludes, we seem to know at least two of the three Green Meanies and I although I’m curious to find out the third, I’m not all that eager to find out because I probably won’t understand the final wrap up because it won’t make sense. Like Hester being the original villain the first time around. Just as things should be tightening, too many things are still unknown, like the storylines for cast members that don’t get featured in current episodes. Still, the acting and overall construction of the show means that it’s always well done, if not totally interesting.
Season 2, Episode 8 (S02E08)
Scream Queens airs Tuesday at 9PM on Fox
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Carly is a freelance writer that watches too much TV while she writes blogs and articles about lifestyle including travel, food, fashion, beauty, home decor, entertainment, health, fitness and wellness and green living.
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Carly Zinderman | Contributor