THE WISH LIST 2010
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Here’s a list traveling around the boards today that had us laughing here, at TB. If anything, it’s a perfect list to bookend the year of great writing and awesome screenplays with a chuckle.
Every year we are inundated with lists. From the Black List to the Brown List to the Blood List to the Brit List to the Hit List, we have seen it all. Now, it’s time for The Wish List, a list of the best unproduced, unwritten screenplays of 2010.
The list is determined based on a comprehensive voting process involving five rounds of nominations, a tribunal of development executives, the BCS computer ranking algorithm, and the United States Electoral College.
The Wish List is not a “best of” list. It is, at best, a “waste of the next few minutes of your life.”
– KDF
WITH 65 MENTIONS
MY BRIDESMAID IS A SLUTTY ASSASSIN
The night before her wedding, a bride-to-be discovers that her bridesmaid is an international assassin … who has been contracted to kill her fiancée … and also, she’s a total slut.
WITH 52 MENTIONS
F**K YOU HOWIE KAPOWSKI, YOU’RE A F**KING MOTHERF**KER
A young man loses his job due to a Lehman Brothers-type financial scandal and returns home to find that his former high school bully is now dating his mother, his grandmother, his stepmother, his ex-girlfriend, and his ex-girlfriend’s mother. Betty White is attached.
WITH 37 MENTIONS
THE DARKENING
A mysterious darkness begins to fall across a sleepy town every night.
WITH 31 MENTIONS
ROBERT FROST AND THE SUNKEN AZTEC TREASURE OF KING TUT
A reimagining of the life of Pulitzer Prize winner Robert Frost as a swashbuckling poet who kicks ass.
WITH 24 MENTIONS
FRENEMIES WITH BENEFITS
When a young man’s longtime female best friend transforms into an evil zombie vampire, the two start sleeping together.
WITH 12 MENTIONS
YEMEN
A CIA analyst relocates to the Republic of Yemen to hunt for an elusive terrorist, but soon finds himself being hunted by the terrorist … his former high school bully.
WITH 9 MENTIONS
ESCALATION
A contained thriller set entirely on a shopping mall escalator. A freshly laid off mall employee gets mixed up with a twisted sociopath who forces him to continue going up the down escalator in order to stay alive.
WITH 7 MENTIONS
BEAUTY & THE BEAST & VAMPIRES & ZOMBIES & DOUCHEBAGS
Set in a post-apocalyptic world, Beauty and the Beast must join forces to take on an army of vampires who then team up to take on an army of zombies who in turn team up to take on an army of douchebags. Betty White is attached.
WITH 5 MENTIONS
UNTITLED RELEVANT FINANCIAL CRISIS THRILLER
A young hotshot securities trader must travel back in time to prevent his company from issuing collateralized debt obligations and unregulated credit default swaps. But things get ugly when the toxic assets begin to fight back.
TAGGED
When a single, socially awkward high school girl accidentally gets tagged in a photo of popular girls on Facebook, her life gets turned upside down for a few minutes. A modern retelling of She’s All That.
WITH 4 MENTIONS
THE WEDDING REGISTRY
A bride-to-be, her sister, and her best friend register for her wedding at Williams- Sonoma. But when they realize they accidentally registered for Calphalon cookware instead of All-Clad, they must quickly race back to fix it. A female Hangover.
POST IT
A quirky tale about an off-center middle manager who works for a faceless corporation and his best friend who is a Post-It Note.
SEX NIGHT
On graduation night, five nerdy high school seniors set out to see who can contract the most sexually transmitted diseases. A modern day Superbad. Betty White is attached.